But I'm not ready!

I like to settle in to a good series- helps me unwind when I have some downtime. So, me and mine recently stumbled upon a series called “Anne with an E”. I have to admit, I had completely dismissed it when I first saw it, but to say it blew my mind would be an understatement. You need to watch it. Anyway, this little orphan girl at the age of 13, began to feel unwell, and was shocked when she woke up in the middle of the night, peeked under her bed covers to find that she had gotten her period!! What?! She quickly took her bed sheets and started washing them vigorously and furiously. Her adoptive guardian woken up by the racket went to find out what was going on. The poor girl was frantic, washing, crying. Her guardian tried to tell her that it was ok, it was normal, she was now a woman. And the girl shouted, “But I am not ready to become a woman”! Whoosh.

I completely understood her dilemma funny as it seemed. How shocking it is for a girl to get her period, even when it is anticipated. I remember the confusion, the embarrassment, and how overwhelmed I was. But I also remember that my mom ensured I was adequately equipped with an array of pads and tampons. I also recall our teacher talking to us over and over about getting periods. And I remember how at school the girls who got their periods acquired an unspoken superiority over the others. It was the thing that separated little girls from young ladies. Never mind that we had numerous staining incidents before we learned how to wear the pads right, how often to change them, how to handle the cramps and all else that comes with it. I have been privileged, in more ways than I can count. Truly blessed to say the least.

I am now a grown woman and very aware of things around me, this awareness has led me into knowing that everyone does not have access to things that I may have taken for granted. There are girls who miss school days or completely drop out because they cannot afford sanitary towels. I imagine the stigma they face when they stain their clothes because the cotton wool, pieces of cloth, toilet paper, feathers and all else are not created to handle the menstrual flow of a girl.

Over the last few months I have had several conversations on the socials, about menstruation, and other biological changes that happen to young people but specifically young girls. It has been such an eye opener to hear from teachers sharing the stories they have about students whose esteem drops when they get their period, or those that skip some days of school, not impervious to the fear of staining their clothes. I have heard stories of women looking to give back because all they had growing up, were pieces of a mattress that they would cut up and use. Can you imagine the discomfort and even the risk of infection? I have also heard stories of people who had no clue what to do when they got their period because nobody ever had a conversation with them about it. Girls who thought something was very wrong- an illness or maybe that they had internal bleeding which would lead to death…! *sigh*

(Greg Complement pictures)

As a woman, I see my role and responsibility clearly outlined to talk about these things, and not feel uncomfortable about them. To normalize the conversation for the sake of young girls. If you’re reading this and squirming  a little bit in your seat, don’t worry, you are in good company. Hopefully we can all get to a place where meaningful conversations can be held about menstruation, and no, not in hushed tonnes. Recently, a gentleman say that he is sorry he laughed at girls when he was in Standard 7. Meaning, that this conversation is not just for the girls, but the boys too. I don’t need to tell you, that adolescents collect insults like charms, letting them define and discourage them. I also know that I have a part to play in dignifying our girls by making sanitary towels accessible to them. Arguably, my efforts are just a drop in the ocean, but I see many women mobilizing people to donate pads and such like initiatives. Surely, if we put our heads together, we CAN make a difference, can’t we? Every girl in every corner of the world needs to know that her period, her coming of age, is normal and very healthy.

So as I finish, let me pose this question to you- if  you were given a chance, what would you do to dignify our girls? 

#Alwaysforthegirl #dignifyourgirls

From my heart to yours,

Kambua M.

Dear Mama

Happy Mother’s Day to every mother, for being strong, resilient, and courageous. For every sacrifice you make to ensure that your children get only the best that life can offer.

Happy Mother’s Day to every woman that knows what it’s like to carry another human for 9 months! Putting up with morning sickness, labor, sleepless nights, to bring life.

Happy Mother’s Day to every woman that has chosen to love a child born by another woman; whether by choice or circumstantial- loving children not born of your womb, but your heart. Giving them a chance to love and be loved.

Emmanuel Jambo Photography

Happy Mother’s Day to every woman who has had to deal with the loss of a child or a pregnancy. Even though your nest may still be empty you are a mother too.

Happy Mother’s Day to every waiting woman. Every woman who has waited longingly for it to be their turn. Secretly dealing with the struggles of infertility, negative tests; empty wombs, empty hearts. Happy Mother’s Day because one day God will fill your heart, and your arms. In His time, and His way.

To every mother, one day in a year is barely sufficient to celebrate all that you have done and continue to do.  But please know, that You are honored. You are deeply appreciated. You are dearly loved. ❤️

From my heart to yours,

Kambua M.

Right Behind You

The other day and friend of mine shared on social media a clip of his daughter learning how to cycle. She had her helmet on, and was for the first time cycling without the training wheels. She did so well, if I may say so myself! It warmed my heart...I remembered my Papa teaching me how to ride a bike as a little girl. Memories that I treasure dearly.
Anyway, what really caught my attention was my friends' voice in the background. He kept saying, "Keep going...I'm right behind you". And going she did! What an assurance to that little girl, that she could keep going without fear of falling because her daddy was right behind her ensuring that all was well.

We've been blessed to see a new year, and I am certain that like me, you have many tasks ahead of you. Targets to meet that keep you up at night sometimes. There are some things I know I need to do- I've made all sorts of excuses in the past. I have cowered, been too afraid to try. What if I fail? What if I'm not so good at it? What if nobody gets it? 

So I thought about my friend and his daughter and drew a parallel between that and my relationship with God. How many times I've taken the road less traveled only because I was sure He was right behind me, reassuring me, cheering me on. Usually I start off afraid, but the more I press on, the more the fear subsides and my confidence in Him grows. 

Nesh Maina Photography

This year as you set out to do whatever it is you need to, please remember that God is with you. He walks with you. He covers you. He believes in you. No harm shall befall you. You will not strike your foot against a stone; you will not fall. And if by chance you do, He's right there to pick you up. He's got you! 

My prayer for you is that your soul will be anchored in God's grace. You will face many moments that require you, like David to encourage yourself in God. Your faith will be tested- you will be stretched. But you have to keep moving. I am learning that sometimes what we need to do and how events unfold don't always line up. But anytime you are tempted to doubt the presence of God, listen to him whisper to your heart over and over again, "Keep going...I'm right behind you"!


From my beating heart, to yours.

Kambua M.