But I'm not ready!

I like to settle in to a good series- helps me unwind when I have some downtime. So, me and mine recently stumbled upon a series called “Anne with an E”. I have to admit, I had completely dismissed it when I first saw it, but to say it blew my mind would be an understatement. You need to watch it. Anyway, this little orphan girl at the age of 13, began to feel unwell, and was shocked when she woke up in the middle of the night, peeked under her bed covers to find that she had gotten her period!! What?! She quickly took her bed sheets and started washing them vigorously and furiously. Her adoptive guardian woken up by the racket went to find out what was going on. The poor girl was frantic, washing, crying. Her guardian tried to tell her that it was ok, it was normal, she was now a woman. And the girl shouted, “But I am not ready to become a woman”! Whoosh.

I completely understood her dilemma funny as it seemed. How shocking it is for a girl to get her period, even when it is anticipated. I remember the confusion, the embarrassment, and how overwhelmed I was. But I also remember that my mom ensured I was adequately equipped with an array of pads and tampons. I also recall our teacher talking to us over and over about getting periods. And I remember how at school the girls who got their periods acquired an unspoken superiority over the others. It was the thing that separated little girls from young ladies. Never mind that we had numerous staining incidents before we learned how to wear the pads right, how often to change them, how to handle the cramps and all else that comes with it. I have been privileged, in more ways than I can count. Truly blessed to say the least.

I am now a grown woman and very aware of things around me, this awareness has led me into knowing that everyone does not have access to things that I may have taken for granted. There are girls who miss school days or completely drop out because they cannot afford sanitary towels. I imagine the stigma they face when they stain their clothes because the cotton wool, pieces of cloth, toilet paper, feathers and all else are not created to handle the menstrual flow of a girl.

Over the last few months I have had several conversations on the socials, about menstruation, and other biological changes that happen to young people but specifically young girls. It has been such an eye opener to hear from teachers sharing the stories they have about students whose esteem drops when they get their period, or those that skip some days of school, not impervious to the fear of staining their clothes. I have heard stories of women looking to give back because all they had growing up, were pieces of a mattress that they would cut up and use. Can you imagine the discomfort and even the risk of infection? I have also heard stories of people who had no clue what to do when they got their period because nobody ever had a conversation with them about it. Girls who thought something was very wrong- an illness or maybe that they had internal bleeding which would lead to death…! *sigh*

(Greg Complement pictures)

As a woman, I see my role and responsibility clearly outlined to talk about these things, and not feel uncomfortable about them. To normalize the conversation for the sake of young girls. If you’re reading this and squirming  a little bit in your seat, don’t worry, you are in good company. Hopefully we can all get to a place where meaningful conversations can be held about menstruation, and no, not in hushed tonnes. Recently, a gentleman say that he is sorry he laughed at girls when he was in Standard 7. Meaning, that this conversation is not just for the girls, but the boys too. I don’t need to tell you, that adolescents collect insults like charms, letting them define and discourage them. I also know that I have a part to play in dignifying our girls by making sanitary towels accessible to them. Arguably, my efforts are just a drop in the ocean, but I see many women mobilizing people to donate pads and such like initiatives. Surely, if we put our heads together, we CAN make a difference, can’t we? Every girl in every corner of the world needs to know that her period, her coming of age, is normal and very healthy.

So as I finish, let me pose this question to you- if  you were given a chance, what would you do to dignify our girls? 

#Alwaysforthegirl #dignifyourgirls

From my heart to yours,

Kambua M.